I always like having goals, long-term and short-term. They get me up in the morning and push me forward when I am tired. I always have a list of projects somewhere on my desk: new pieces to learn, challenging repertoire to revisit, performances to prepare, or—for fun—a new recipe to try, and a new kind of flower to grow. I love the sense of fulfillment whenever I cross of an item on the lists.
In mid-March, before the official implementation of PAUSE, with the anticipation of the unavoidable, I made a long list of projects to keep myself entertained. I wished to write to many friends. Some of them helped me through the months while mom was ill and hospitalized. I was behind on the upkeep of my blog. I needed to prepare the garden for a new year of growth. I liked to tend to the once-abandoned hill next to our building. I should repaint the window casings.
I got going. And, everything on my list began to take on a life of its own. As I wrote to some old friends, I thought about more people whom I hadn’t heard from for a while. While reorganizing my site, I saw more and more details needing attention. Once the winter debris were removed, seeds need to be sown and old plants need to be fed. There were endless chores to be done on the hill and numerous varieties to be identified. And, the window casings. . ..
It takes forever to get these things done. And, there is an overabundance of “forever” in my life as well as in everyone else’s.
Many of my colleagues are taking the opportunity to polish up their work, to plan future performances—whenever they might be, and to support each other’s efforts moving forward. For us, losing a few upcoming jobs is less worrisome then not knowing when or if our old routines will return. For me, the most urgent thing is to stay inspired.
I thank my friends who sent me music to read. I thank my friends who asked me to explore new ideas. I thank my friends who checked on my progress. I am thankful for all the people that make it possible for me to be fulfilled.
